@snotnboogers23: Well, at least my kids are finding new and exciting ways to make my two college degrees meaningless.
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@Malocallidus: I see dead people. Well actually they're stupid people, but give me a few minutes
@TheDailySchmuck: *wakes up after all night party* *rolls over* *rolls over* *rolls over* How did I get on this escalator?
@MissNaughty1801: Him: you are correcting my every word for the last six years of our marriage Me: for the last 7 years
@Underchilde: What I bring to a relationship is pretty much the same stuff you can pick up at any hardware store.