@AristotlesNZ: We'll take these $75 baby shoes. No need for a shoe box. We'll just let him wear & outgrow them on the car ride home.
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@Brampersandon_: NURSE: do you have any allergies ME: burnt bread NURSE: you're allergic to burnt bread? ME: yes I'm black toast intolerant
@Try2StopME: Girl1: Why are you so happy? Girl2: I was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that said "Parking Fine"
@Coolisiana: Obama: "I have no more campaigns to run...because I won both of them" Biden like 2 years later: LOL OH I GET IT. HES BEEN PRESIDENT FOR TW