@shwebby3: Went off roading with my prius but ended up getting stuck on a bonsai tree in neighbor's front yard
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@VaDawn13: Dear Restaurant Managers: If more than 3 employees ask me how I'm enjoying my meal, I begin to wonder if you know something I don't know.
@noog: Just heard a little boy call his mom "mother," as if both had already accepted the fact that he'd become a serial killer some day.
@LizHackett: It's 11:48 PM. You can't sleep. Underneath your bed, there's a creepy rustle, as the clown tries to quietly unwrap and eat a granola bar.
@LadyBombs: I'm good now. I pretended the vegetables I was chopping were actually people. It helped.