@LimeyTheGreat: Went out to dinner last night & the hostess asked me "Where would you like to sit?" I replied "preferably on a seat." #accomplished
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@TheBoydP: Did you know that McDonald's once sold a burger named after the Hamburglar? It was discontinued however because the meat was too robbery.
@junejuly12: Still wake up in a cold sweat thinking about my love note that was passed to the wrong boy in kindergarten.
@_davidlucas_: Leviticus 20:13 legalises gay marriage and marijuana: "If a man lays with another man he should be stoned".