@WilliamAder: We're throwing a surprise retirement party for a guy at the office and the "party" isn't the surprise.
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@LindseyEllison2: If you like to speak in different languages while high off marijuana, you're probably Rosetta Stoned.
@Camel_Crushin: Genesis is my favorite rock group who've been around long enough to write a chapter in the bible.
@nagunnatelya: Husband: Have you lost weight? Me: About 10 lbs H: Who you trying to look good for? *wink M: You don't know him. He's on Twitter...