We're redesigning Funny Tweeter. Your feedback is always welcome. Talk to us at @funTweeters
@shanethevein: What a rip off.
There's no pot in this chicken-pot-pie.
@bacon_gillepic: No intelligent people were harmed in the reading of this tweet
@Parentpains: When all else fails burn shit, people will forget how much of a failure you are when they see stuff on fire.
@NicCageMatch: "Hello darkness my old friend."
Darkness: I'm not lending you any money.
@TheTweetOfGod: On one hand, eating meat is bad for your body, bad for animals and bad for the earth. On the other hand, bacon.
@fro_vo: ME: oh no inanimate objects are coming to life
FRIEND: what where
ME: look out the window
STEPHEN KING: But the warning came too late. The evil window attacked