@itsboyschapter: what dating me is like
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@FeralCrone: Listen, you should really give your mother a call. She's concerned that "the haters" in her Zumba class are organizing and gaining power.
@TheJamieLee: Never understand when someone says, "cats are snobby." Like dogs are constantly inviting you & the kids over for burgers & a swim?
@jordan_stratton: My parents never allowed violent video games. Just family-friendly board games with questions like, "Who murdered this guy with a pipe?"
@scorpicpanda: Me: "OMG, my abs are so sore!" 12: (sarcastically) "What abs?" Me: "The abs hiding under this protective layer of you're grounded."