@jwoodham: What do I look for in a girl? Well she has to be hot. And well-rounded. And cheesy. Extra guac. Wait, wrong list, this is my Chipotle order.
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@Laser_Cat: The British are coming! The British are coming! The British have to get up early! The British swear they'll call you in the morning!
@wickedimproper: I'm so old I thought "stfu" was a reminder to pack my "shoes, tie, fedora, underpants."
@EndhooS: [Watching boxing] Sure bro, I watch boxing all the ti- HEY DID YOU SEE WHAT HE JUST DID?! HE JUST PUNCHED THAT GUY! SOMEONE CALL THE COPS!
@Alex_N_Chains: I had my appendix taken out as a child. They said it was useless, but based on my life since then, I'm guessing it controls motivation.