@omgthatspunny: What do you call a computer that sings? A Dell!
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@knot_eye: I was so happy my mail order bride arrived today. My Wife wasn't. She did say I can use the crate as a doghouse. Odd, we don't own a dog.
@AlyssaDiSalle: Co-worker: "If you love something, set it free, if it comes back it's yours to k.." Me - "THOSE ARE BOOMERANGS, MICHELLE."
@captainkalvis: ANCHOR: we now go live to our new field meteorologist who will issue a storm warning ME: *pointing at the sky* DON'T. YOU. DARE.