@omgthatspunny: What do you call a computer that sings? A Dell!
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@slimmy_shady: If anyone wants a tiger let me know. I bought one but he's being a d-bag and won't wear the matching sunglasses I bought us.
@NYC_Blonde: Let's all take a moment to honor National Punctuation Day because life would be: very, confusing! Without it?
@scarebro: Maybe your parents told you a watched pot never boils so you wouldn't go around sticking your face near boiling water, idiot.