@omgthatspunny: What do you call a computer that sings? A Dell!
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@Try2StopME: *washing car* Neighbor: "You washing your car?" Me: "No. I'm watering it to see if it grows into a bus."
@GrantTanaka: showed up to a party wearing the same shirt as someone else, how did we both fit in one shirt
@BCMontgo: I was going through a stack of yearbooks yesterday when I saw I was voted "Most Likely to Steal all These Damn Yearbooks".