@canadasandra: What does it mean if the Holy Water sizzles when it hits your skin (asking for a friend)
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@matny: I want to follow a random family around Disneyland for a day and just be in the background of all of their photos.
@deardilettante: I am literally the only one at this baby shower who turned up with champagne & a coat hanger.
@BubblesnBooze: It's funny how your tweets are funnier now that I know you're hot. -everyone on Twitter