@JamesHavoc: What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for bears. Bears will kill you.
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@EJGomez: [speed dating] *girl sits down* "hi im melan- QUICK A ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE HAPPENS WHAT WEAPON DO YOU USE "wha- CORRECT ANSWER WAS KATANA. NEXT
@iLikeCatShirts: You'd be surprised at all the discounts you get when you come in swinging a sword!
@KateWhineHall: I'm eating a vegan lunch today. Sure, it's six sleeves of Smarties and a Diet Coke, but I'm still better than you.