@missmayn: What happened to sneaking out and getting drunk in the woods? Teenagers these days be all “I hate you mom I’m joining ISIS.”
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@beefman138: "Wow, that's great!" ~ Me, not paying attention, and hoping you didn't just tell me your Grandma died.
@ClichedOut: Me: I have an imaginary gf. Therapist: U can do better than that. M: I know, it's just-- T: I was talking to her.
@_Kim_Jongun: I hired a PR team. They said the public would like me more if I stopped executing people. I executed the PR team.