@P1ssed_K1d: What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math.
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@TheRobCee: [labels account "18+"] [tweets exclusively about voting & buying cigarettes legally]
@HatfieldAnne: Tell me again how I unloaded the dishwasher too loudly when you were watching golf. Detectives will want to know exactly how this went down.
@dlsims01: A woman always gets the last word in an argument, because anything a man says after that is the first words in a new argument.
@Annoyedworld: I suck my stomach in when ever I weigh myself!nnIt doesn't make me weigh less but at least I can see the numbers!