@HRTSMRT: What I say: No!
What my kids hear: There's a really good chance if you keep asking.
@Tayl0rBr00ks: A bald guy in a turtleneck sweater looks 97% like a roll-on deodorant.
@AJslackie: Sex so bad, Taylor Swift breaks up with you and doesn't even write a song about it.
@Darlainky: You don't know true paranoia until you Google "How to tell if you're being spied on" and a photo of your living room comes up.
@Awk0Tacoo: I can't get mad when I hear babies screaming in public because honestly, I feel the same way sometimes.
@jwoodham: Hey [STOP] Got your voicemail earlier [STOP] I'm replying with a telegram because you're apparently a big fan of outdated technology [STOP]