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@Fred_Delicious: What idiot called it a rhyme book & not rapping paper
@E_lok44: When a 230 lb man yells from the shower for a towel, but you hand him a face cloth, he won't find it nearly as funny as you do.
@pakalupapito: livin la vida broka
@robyn_vo: Dad: HEY come here, did you go to school with this guy on tv?
Me: Dad, that's Spongebob Squarepants
Dad: Must've been in your sister's class
@beefman138: I highly recommend anything.
@truegritrumble: DATE: I think nervous boys are cute.
ME: *responding with confidence for the first time in my life* Excellent!
DATE: This date is over.