@ABurgerADay: What idiot called it the road to Bethlehem instead of the highway to the manger zone?
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@Dutch_50: Co-worker insists on talking with his mouth full. No one can ever understand him. Wish we had a dentist was in the house to interpret.
@Glorificus917: When someone asks me if I'm seeing anyone, I automatically assume they're talking about a psychiatrist.
@WilliamAder: Auto-correct turned "likeable" into "lickable" and the new intern is confused by her evaluation.
@internetluke: GOD: welcome to Heaven I will answer any question you want now. ME: why does Target have 25 checkout lanes with only 2 always open? GOD: ...