@markleggett: What if birds have tiny human-like ears underneath their feathers? That's certainly something to think about, but not during sex.
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@LeBearGirdle: Lawyer: so tell me, why was my client's mouth bleeding? Dentist: he doesn't floss Me: You hit me! D: [puts lips on mic] bc you don't floss
@JessObsess: Just slung my bra off & threw it to the other side of the couch where there are already 2 other bras. If my math is right, it's Wednesday.
@JennyJohnsonHi5: Today is Star Wars Day, which means we should all reflect on a simpler time in our lives, when Harrison Ford didn't have an earring.