@shashaintl: What if I never *dramatic pause* sleep *dramatic pause* a- *falls asleep during third dramatic pause*
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@sophielou: My aunt cuts her name & address label from magazines for fear of the legendary “saw your name & address on a magazine label” murderer
@TheTweetOfGod: Stuck in church. Everyone’s singing “What a Friend We Have in Jesus”. Damn, My son has some stupid friends.
@PinkCamoTO: H: So what's the worst thing you've ever seen someone do? Me: I watched a mother buy her son a harmonica.