@MichaelGoffLA: What if you told a lie to cover up your affair, and the lie was so good that 2000 years later people were still giving each other presents?
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@MoistPork: Have your tribal tattoo call my tramp stamp and let's make beautiful, douchey babies together.
@vineyille: Day 20. Still lost at sea. Crew thinks I know how to plot a course with a protractor. I just like making it walk on the map. Pointy Leg Man.
@1slowery1: *Creates Animals* God: They're magnificent. Angel: Some of ur best work. Man: Which ones go on pizza?
@XplodingUnicorn: [hardware store] Me: Let me do the talking. This is man stuff Wife: Fine Clerk: Can I help you? Me: I need a whacker thingy to hit nails