@prontopup: What the hell is this REstraining Order?!? I never even got a Straining Order? I'm gonna go over to her house and sort this out.
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@EndhooS: [Jack Black's birthday] Oh wow..ANOTHER rock polisher, thanks grandma. "How is Rock School going dear?" It's School of ro- *sigh* nevermind.
@dshack8: 3. The number of times you can flip a grilled cheese sandwich before you notice that you have the pan on the wrong burner...cuz of Twitter.
@hipstermermaid: It's amazing that whales have evolved to live for over 700 years and humans have evolved to spread misinformation online! Nature's wonders!