@mrjohntofu: What the world needs is a self help movie, cause lets face it, most of us won't buy the book.
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@EndhooS: [Bunch of 6 year olds knock on my door] "TRICK OR TREAT!" You kids are in for a real treat... *slips each of them a copy of my demo tape*
@MichaelTrying: As an atheist I don’t receive many xmas cards and the ones I do disproportionately say “may God have mercy on your soul.”
@Laser_Cat: Chocolate fountains are so 20th century. This is the future. At my wedding we're having a burrito fountain.