@Ellierocks2013: Whatever, low battery indicator. You're not the boss of
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@FirstDateStory: "My date took me to a nice restaurant. Our server leaned in to me and said, "You're the third one this week"
@OutOnTheMoors: Having persuaded autocorrect that I don't want to duck anything, I hope the council don't take my complaint about the pond the wrong way.
@kcmoore51: Does everyone have that ONE follower who will Fav the hell outta every RT...but wouldn't even piss on your own tweets if they were on fire?
@Kaylezor: On the Wikipedia page for List of Serial Killers by Number of Victims it says "This page is incomplete. You can help by expanding it." Omg.