@autocorrects: What's that thing called when your crush likes you back? oh yeah imagination
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@AristotlesNZ: Wife: How's the baby? Me: He keeps trying to shove socks thru the mail slot. Wife: Aw. His socks or yours? Me: Socks is the neighbor's cat..
@MesutOzilClass: Arsenal did the mannequin challenge for 89minutes at Old Trafford and still drew.😂
@NurseSeymour: Jamie on FB just took a quiz to find out what type of flower she is. She's a vibrant poppy. Weird, all this time I thought she was human.
@SteveSuckington: "I'm still a virgin" -theres plenty of fish in the sea "Ur right. I'll find someone" -no, I mean u should give up & be a lonely fisherman