@omerwahaj: What's the name of that movie with that actor in which the guy does that thing with that other thing in that place during that time?
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@JasonLastname: Doesn't count, officer, you forgot to read me my amanda rights! "Your what?" You know, my... [mumbles] banana rights.
@merican_ninjy: Pro tip: when a cop asks you to step out of the car, don't reply with "I'm too drunk, you get in."
@stiggib3: My daugjter just ruined Toy Story for ever. She said if one of the toys died Andy wouldnt know and he'd carry on playing with its corpse
@dave_cactus: TRUMP: Millions of Draculas are entering our country illegally from Transylvania. The security of our nation is a stake!