@SteveSuckington: What's the smallest amount of money you would reach into a toilet to get? Mine is a skittle.
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@SatansTongue: 6th grade nurse: do you play baseball Me: uhh why Nurse: your right arm is so much stronger than- Me: oh yeah! Yeah I play baseball so much
@Tmoney68: [Sloth Job Interview] Sloth Boss: How would you describe yourself? *2 hours later* Sloth Interviewee: Quick-thinking.
@kornelski: Intel's responses are magic: - There's a design flaw in Intel CPUs. - Intel: no, they work as designed. - It allows stealing of passwords. - Intel: no, it doesn't corrupt data. - There are three bugs. - Intel: we've fixed both.