@mzeld: What's your body type? Mine is "giant gummy bear."
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@TheBoydP: I was getting fed up at my job and was considering quitting but they’ve upgraded the toilet paper in the office restroom so I’m good now.
@Try2StopME: Most people in horror movies would still be alive, if only those idiots had listened to the audience.
@MummaCrazy: "Yeah, those black pants are okay. They just need a little something. Hang on.." [rubs up against your leg] "that's better" -cats
@3sunzzz: 4yo: Do you want to play pretend? Me: I already am. 4yo: What pretend? Me: Shh, you're not here.