@DaddyJew: When a cop eats bacon is it considered cannibalism?
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@theNuzzy: Facebook: Adele is such an inspiration. Instagram: Adele looking beautiful in her gown. Twitter: Adele sounds like a chimney sweeper.
@alli_win: I'm convinced that Santa is so jolly because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
@BrainFumbles: They said she was a cat lady but when I threw her off a small building she didn't land on her feet and now I'm in jail for murder.