@Papa_Mex: When a coworker pisses me off, I like to write his name down for 23 boxes of girl scout cookies on the form in the break room
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@LionJenkins: I imagine colonoscopies are accompanied by the theme music from the underground level of Super Mario Bros.
@TheAlexNevil: It's amazing how a simple act of kindness can change my bad mood into a suspicious bad mood.
@SuperRandomish: Me: *singing "Don't stop believing"* Joe: What are you doing? Me: Practicing for Journey duty J: You mean Jury duty? M: No, it says...shit
@toastymoe: Some people should be forced to carry a plant around with them, to replace the oxygen they waste.