@flyafuckingkite: When a seeing eye dog poops, who cleans it up? This is the kind of stuff that makes my head hurt.
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@TheAlexNevil: Sometimes you meet someone and know instantly how much you regret leaving your home.
@KrazykurtKurt: When I practice my saxophone I have to put the cat in the window, so my neighbours know I'm not kicking it around the living room.
@Reverend_Scott: Call me old fashioned, but I think any woman that can open the lid of a jar by herself is a witch.