@SamGrittner: When a woman asks me how long I can last in bed I tell her it depends on how long someone brings me food and water but probably years.
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@TheAlexP: Don't you hate when you do something out of the kindness of your heart & someone gets upset because you shoved a pack of gum in their mouth?
@BuckyIsotope: When you gaze into the abyss sometimes the abyss pats you gently on the hand and says she's just not that into you.
@Thedudish: If God had a sense of humor, he would have asked Noah to bring a pair of termites on board.