@SamGrittner: When a woman asks me how long I can last in bed I tell her it depends on how long someone brings me food and water but probably years.
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@lecalabara: Humans are so stupid! This is why aliens probe us. They think our brains are up our butts.
@Brianhopecomedy: I told my wife that size shouldn't matter so she went out shopping and bought my "boys room" a new 4 inch TV.
@carlyken: "Mom, what does married mean?" Taking naps together "Daddy naps with his secretary are they married?" No, that means he's getting divorced