@Smooheed: When anyone says they've embarrassed themselves enough for one day, I smile, nod and think 'that kind of limit sounds nice'
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@Kyle_Lippert: [A bengals fan watching Titanic] I can't wait until the end when Jack and Rose get married
@amydillon: My favorite game with the kids is one where I play dead until they go around to their dad's side of the bed and wake him up.
@wittwitbarista: I just saw a woman push 5 little kids in a shopping cart out of Walmart. I didn't realize that you could get them in bulk now.
@pleatedjeans: Fear not, ugly caterpillar. For one day you will become a beautiful butterfly [emerges from cocoon] AH WTF I'M A MOTH THIS IS BULLSHIT