@Amburglar_: When asked by the creepy guy at the bar "Why aren't you smiling?" my go-to answer is always "My yeast infection really is bubbling up."
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@mompsychologist: 3yo: *follows me into bathroom* Me: "Privacy, please" 3yo: "Oh, right" *closes door* "Now we have privacy, Mommy"
@iwearaonesie: if you want your wife to take you seriously, don't throw your sippy cup during an argument
@BuckyIsotope: "What's up, doc?" says Bugs Bunny. "Not you," laughs the doctor. "Take these little blue pills." *Looney Tunes music plays*