@snatch_stache: When dealing with the police it's important to always remain calm and be white.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@AndyAsAdjective: [1st date] WAITER: and how would you like your steak, miss? HER: definitely not wooden *winks across table* DRACULA: *just glares at her*
@asimplesean: Just saw a dog with three legs. He did have a fourth leg, but he also had three legs.
@TheCatWhisprer: [pulling the casket a few inches away from the wall during a funeral] sorry just need to plug in my phone for a minute