@shariv67: When dogs suddenly stop licking themselves and stare into the distance, they're thinking, "Shit. Did I leave the iron on?"
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@Parkerlawyer: My client's (soon to be ex) wife just flipped me off in the courthouse parking lot, so yeah, I'm obviously doing my job right.
@shanethevein: Whenever I leave a fancy restaurant I tell the people coming in "I recommend the squirrel".
@vineyille: How’d you come up with the idea? Inventor of pac man: I took a bunch of pills one night and ate a ghost. I thought “now here’s something”