@djdarrellripley: When I die I don't want a big funeral. I'd just like a few of my close friends to get together and try to bring me back to life...
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@JennyJohnsonHi5: Today is Star Wars Day, which means we should all reflect on a simpler time in our lives, when Harrison Ford didn't have an earring.
@heytherecore: [Dinner with GF's parents] Thank you for having me over, can I use the bathroom? "MAY I use the bathroom" *slams fists down* I ASKED FIRST
@Playing4Second: CW: Have you had 5 guys? Me: *blank stare* That's kinda personal don't ya think? And that's when I found out it's the name of a burger joint