@donni: When I die, I'm donating my body to Simons. I tell this to every Simon I meet. So far, they're not into it
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@TheSharona06: Today seems like a good day to wash my hair and take 10 selfies wearing 10 different shirts so I can pretend I look human on a regular basis
@Bob_Janke: My cat sat up from a dead sleep and stared, frantic toward the empty basement laundry room so I guess I'll be buying a new house now.
@ddsmidt: Sure you call it a college fund for your kid, yet deep in your heart you know it’s bond money.