@bourgeoisalien: When I die, I'm donating my body to the theater department. Any jerk could donate their body to science. I can't wait to be a theater prop.
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@mortimermaiden: Doctor: I'm afraid we've lost him. Mother: What? But he was just getting a few stitches! Doctor: It's just a figure of speech, ma'am, he's right here in the morgue.
@joe_binkley: I want to be a server at a restaurant that serves fish jelly, just so when people order it, I can say "I don't think you're ready."
@PaperWash: HAHA! Answer your phone silly. I called you like 18 times. -I say as I climb through your window