@pixelatedboat: When I die, PLEASE don't bury me in a fancy suit. That happened to a guy I knew and it turned him into a skeleton.
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@ClaytonSykes: Revere rides a horse saying "The British are Coming"and it's heroic but I hop a pogo stick naked screaming "look at me"and it's probation?
@generaldietz: Mark Wahlberg's mom: Marky Mark! It's time for a snacky snacky before you take a nappy nap. Mark Wahlberg: Jesus, mom. I'm 44. What snack?
@TheCatWhisprer: Relieved to finally get a new microchipped debit card that provides added security to protect the $13.68 in my checking account.