@DulciePlaid: When I left for work this morning, the dog begged me to stay and the cat handed me my keys.
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@TVsCarlKinsella: FOUNDER OF HOGWARTS: okay, so we all know there are four types of kid. brave, smart, evil and miscellaneous. SCHOOL BOARD: yes, continue.
@kittykaresless: Boss confused me with another employee and fired me. Then called two days later to fire me for not showing up for 2 days. #HowIGotFired
@WildeThingy: Spider bucket list: 1. Eat flies 2. Don't get squashed by a crazy screaming lady when all I'm doing is eating flies 3. Meet Peter Parker