@SCbchbum: When I reached the border patrol checkpoint, I raised my kale smoothie & the officer immediately waved me through.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheDizzyBeauty: Kinda creepy that my kids got in a screaming match over which one is my favorite since I don't have any kids.
@flashember: [Scientist describing evolution of the zebra] "We believe they were crime horses that stayed in jail for like a really, really long time."
@13spencer: I'm sick and I'm going to work today; so if there's some kind of Contagion-level outbreak, I'm your patient-zero.