@JimmerThatisAll: When I say I'm as sober as a judge I mean Paula Abdul.
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@jabbins: Left my car for maybe 15 minutes in front of the dorms and I come back to this. College man
@Quartzjixler: Shipwreck survivors on an island S1: We told you to spell 'SOS' with those coconuts! S2: I know but I want our rescuers to know I'm a vegan.
@behindyourback: Birds do it/Bees do it/Even educated fleas do it/Let's do it/Let's make people super nervous anytime we're in their personal space
@Steelers1972: My friend has canceled our lunch plans three days in a row. I'm starting to think she really doesn't like lunch.