@karencreets: When I see a car with a Romney bumper sticker driving near a car with an Obama sticker I want them to turn into transformers & battle
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@leadnotfolow: There are only 2 Canadian things I don't like: 1) Celine Dion 2) Canadian geese Guess which one is chasing me everytime I go outside.
@ClaytonSykes: After buying toilet paper at Walgreens, the cashier said, "you'll need your receipt." I don't think I've ever been this scared in my life...
@thatfinguy: Pretty woman wouldn't have been as sweet of a love story if we saw all the times she sucked c**k for money weeks prior.
@Nicoleroxxu: One more glass of wine and my "only a lesbian from the waist up" rule is about to go out the window.