@weinerdog4life: When I turn on the lights all of the dads scatter off of my deck, the fat dads can't get over the fence
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@katiefzack: I don't throw people under the bus because there's a chance they could lay flat in the center and not get hurt, which I'm not okay with.
@lovemyboots111: Are you guys sure common sense can't be beaten into people ? Because I'd like to give it try!
@dafloydsta: [first date] HER: I really like you ME: I like you too HER: So did you bring protection? ME: *gesturing to my bodyguard* Yeah, this is Tony
@badbanana: Man of Steel question. When young Clark Kent was wearing a cape in the yard, who was he pretending to be? Liberace?