@weinerdog4life: When I turn on the lights all of the dads scatter off of my deck, the fat dads can't get over the fence
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheTalkingPipe: Her dad said he'd like to see me make an honest woman out of her. I had to resist the urge to tell him that ship sailed long before me.
@Breadery: When we first dated I thought your freckles were dots of inexcusable cuteness. Now I can see how joined up they draw a pentagram.
@SortaBad: John: Yesterday... Paul: All my troubles seemed so far away George: But now it looks... Ringo: Waterslides hurt if they aren't wet enough
@Rollmaninoz: *Shrek pre-production meeting* Producer: Do we have a name for the dragon yet Guy who named the donkey “Donkey”: I was thinking Dragon sir