@jake_lach: When I was 12 I ate a bee to impress a girl, and she just sent me a friend request on Facebook. So, mission accomplished.
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@VeryLonelyLuke: I adopted a rock. He just sits there and does nothing all day. It still beats raising Kylo.
@AdamBroud: Anchor:Actress Zooey Dechanel has murdered an entire town Co-Anchor:Lol who murders a whole town A:So quirky C:Haha America's sweetheart
@RobElliottComic: Say "Literally" and "Legit" a few more times in that sentence so I know it's literally legit