@LoveNLunchmeat: When I was 8 yrs old, I walked to school by myself; now you have to hold your kid's hand right up to their first drug deal.
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@dixonshuman: My memory is horrible but I remember every person I loaned a book to that didn't return it.
@ericsshadow: "Stop texting me. If I wanted to go on the second date, I wouldn't have stolen all your jewelry."
@cmfh111: my daughter said her hand hurts when she moves it, her brother said "stop moving it then." my work here is done.