@GaryJanetti: When I was in my twenties we didn't have hipsters we had AIDS, which was almost as bad.
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@jlock17: Subway only exists because we're all too damn lazy to throw a sandwich together. "Could you lay meat on that bread for me? Here's $8."
@thatUPSdude: Went to Hollister but nothing fit, plus got lost in there for a week. Came out 30lbs lighter, so went back in to buy a shirt. Well played.
@TwinSurvivalist: Let's not buy them two of all the same toys we said. It'll teach them to share, we said. We are idiots.
@CabetoMejia: From 3am to 6am this morning I wanted to kill myself, but now I want some French toast. #cravings