@5oulhealer: When I was little I asked God for a bike. He didn't deliver so I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness instead.
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@Underchilde: The fastest way to get to the front of the line at Starbucks is just to tell everyone you saw Adele outside.
@leahlovescheez: My gynecologist recognized me at the grocery store, so I guess I need to start wearing longer skirts.