@osigat: When I was young, I wanted to date a doctor for money. How superficial was that? Now it would be for the prescriptions.
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@pattymo: After every one of Benedict Cumberbatch's lines in DR. STRANGE, turn to your neighbor & say "I guess that's why they call him Dr. Strange"
@causticbob: Last night, I fell asleep with one of those new e-cigarettes in my mouth.I woke up half an hour later and my whole house was on the internet
@DaddyJew: Doctor: are you an active marijuana user? Me: not really, I usually just sit on the couch and play video games
@halloweenbears: If u want to sound smart just make up coding languages. Like "yeah I know DeltaCube, 17v and Amorph," literally nobody will know theyre fake