@Cool_Jesse: When I wrote "Spiritual" on my online-dating profile, I meant I like to watch 'Ghostbusters'.
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@Floatersfinest: I think the government looks at Twitter and thinks 'This is WAY cheaper than Asylums'
@jordan_stratton: Remember--the only thing standing between you and your dreams is your appearance, lack of talent, and general personality.
@lenigs17: If I liked one of your pics from 12 weeks ago, doesn't mean I'm stalking you...It just means you haven't looked nice in awhile
@glittergirlD43: Hey NSA... I accidentally deleted an email... Can I get you to forward me your copy?