@mommy_cusses: When I'm old, I'm gonna giggle uncontrollably, squirm, and go all sack of potatoes on my son when he tries to get me in the car as payback.
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@halvewit: I think my neighbor is very sick. I have now seen him putting no less than six of his arms in his garbage over the past year.
@Kyle_Lippert: I nominate Chris Brown to dump a bucket of boiling hot water on himself & to raise awareness for domestic violence.
@Probgoblin: I run down a hospital corridor, clutching the mustard dispenser I liberated from the cafeteria. Earlier I had a plan. Now I have mustard.